Best Reads of 2021

This year, I read 34 books and here's a roundup of my four favorites. Below you'll see a list of ten honorable mentions that were also excellent. I only finish a book if I like it, so these fourteen books are all great!

My list this year includes

• Two novels, one nonfiction book, & one art collection
• One female author & three male authors
• Authors who are African American, Dutch American, Thai, and Chinese Malaysian. 

Here are my four best reads of 2021 in the order I finished them.

The Nickel Boys by Colson Whitehead

Genre: fiction

Year published: 2019

Awards & Accolades: Pulitzer Prize for Fiction; New York Times bestseller; and lots more awards

Why I liked it: Colson Whitehead ranks among only four authors who have ever won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction more than once. This is the book that won one of them (his other winning book: The Underground Railroad which I also recommend). Compact, devastating, with a powerful though subtle ring of hope at the end, The Nickel Boys is about two Black boys unjustly sentenced to a hellish reform school that is based off a real life reformatory that operated in Florida for over 100 years. I walked away with a deeper understanding of the high cost of hope and peaceful protest in the face of violent injustice. A must re-read for me.

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk

Genre: nonfiction

Year published: 2015

Why I liked it: I had been hearing about this book everywhere for a few years. Dr. van der Kolk, psychiatrist and trauma expert, lays out how trauma reshapes the brain and affects the body and how embodied therapies (drama, yoga, sports) can be used to heal the brain and body. This book is a bit of a deep dive, I'm sure they are assigning it in college courses these days, but the effort is well worth it. I walked away with a changed perspective on the deep connections between our minds and bodies.

Christ on the Bangkok Road by Sawai Chinnawong

Genre: art

Year published: 2000

Why I liked it: Sawai Chinnawong portrays Christianity through traditional Thai drawing and painting. In his own words, "I believe Jesus Christ is present in every culture, and I have chosen to celebrate his presence in our lives through Thai traditional cultural forms." Over the summer, I feasted daily on this book, gazing on one image and reading its description every day. Gorgeous. (I think the only place to get a copy is through OMSC at Princeton Theological Seminary.)

The Night Tiger by Yangsze Choo

Genre: fiction

Year published: 2019

Awards & Accolades: New York Times Bestseller; Reese Witherspoon's book club

Why I liked it: Choo's novel is set in 1930s Malaysia and follows the interlocking adventures of a young woman struggling against societal and familial expectations for her and the story of a young boy on a mission to fulfill his master's dying wish. This coming of age story is full of mystery, magic, and superstition with a sweet love story woven throughout. I loved the lush descriptions of the culture and place that feel familiar from our years in Southeast Asia. I lost sleep over the page turning suspense. Mesmerizing.

Other great reads of 2021:

Becoming Brave by Brenda Salter McNeil - I love the way this veteran in racial reconciliation uses her own journey and the story of Esther to guide the reader in anti-racism work.

Developing Female Leaders by Kadi Cole - A practical guide on unleashing women as leaders in Christian ministry contexts.

Roots by Alex Haley - This epic story follows multiple generations of a single family and deepened my understanding of the way slavery abruptly severs the identity of family and place for so many.

Interior Chinatown by Charles Wu - It took me a bit to figure out what this quirky book was doing, but in the end I loved the originality and the humorous and biting ways it portrayed some of the Asian-American experience.

Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens - Murder mystery, coming of age story, and love story - I loved how the characters paralleled possibilities in our relationship to the natural world.

Shalom and the Community of Creation by Randy Woodley - This theologian deepened my appreciation of the Biblical concept of shalom through his Native American cultural lens.

How to Fight Racism by Jemar Tisby - I thought I knew a lot already and this book showed that I still have so much to learn.

Prayer by Richard Foster - This book expanded both my knowledge and practice of many different types of prayer.

In the Woods and The Likeness both by Tana French - I had trouble setting down these two beautifully written, page-turner murder mysteries set near Dublin.

Best Reads of 2020

2020 fell short in so many ways. But, not in the books category. 

Book after book after book that I read this year was EXCELLENT. I AGONIZED over what to include in this list. This year, I've written up longer descriptions for the four books that (I think) were my favorites. I then recommend another large handful of runners-up.

Note: Over the years, I've become more and more committed to diversifying my reading (i.e. more authors of color, non-Americans, women). In 2020, I was inspired to see many, many people commit to reading more books by people of color, especially Black authors. Here are some excellent reads to encourage your commitment. The vast majority of these authors are people of color and over half are women.

"The Poisonwood Bible" by Barbara Kingsolver

Description: A fictional account of a Baptist minister who moves his family to the Belgian Congo in the 1950s to be missionaries. The story is told from the perspective of his wife and four daughters.

Why I liked it: I first read this book about ten years ago and was deeply moved. So I read it again this fall. It is long, 500+ pages, so you get to really settle into the story and the characters. Kingsolver masterfully develops the main characters by writing the story from the wife and daughters' perspectives, changing the narrator with every chapter. She nails their different ages and personalities and quirks. This story is both gripping and at times heart-wrenching. It explores many themes -- colonialism, missions, mental health, physical disability, poverty, race, etc. This book will make you think about things worth thinking about.

"Homegoing" by Yaa Gyasi

Description: Two sisters are born in Africa's Gold Coast in the 1700s - one sister marries a wealthy Englishman and stays and the other sister becomes enslaved in the US. This fictional story follows the lives of their descendants up to the present day.

Why I liked it: The author, Yaa Gyasi, is a young, Ghanaian-American woman who grew up in both Ghana and the US. This is her debut novel and, my goodness, it's stunning. Every chapter alternates between the two lines of the family, one in Ghana and one in the United States moving chapter by chapter down the lineage of each of the sisters. Gyasi touches many landmark events in the history of Ghana and the US. The themes of heritage, home, and identity were strong and poignant throughout this beautiful novel.

"The Cross and the Lynching Tree" by James Cone

Lots of triggering, emotionally heavy thoughts below. Feel free to skip.

Description: James Cone, a prominent African American theologian, explores two of the most charged symbols for Black Americans - the cross and the lynching tree. 

Why I liked it: I began reading The Cross and the Lynching Tree early in 2020 and finished it in June against the backdrop of the nation (and the world) in uproar over the murder of George Floyd. I had never considered the similarities between Christ's crucifixion and the lynching of Black people - Christ was a young, brown man from a minority people who, though he was innocent, was killed on a tree. Now, when I look at the faces of Ahmaud Arbery and Breonna Taylor, I see Christ.

The Bible

Description: It's the Bible. Do I need to describe?

Why I liked it: This summer, I did a "Bible shred" where you read/skim the whole book in 30 days. It took me about two months. I'm normally the slowest Scripture reader on the planet. I'll often reflect on a passage for days (or even months!) It was new experience to inhale massive amounts of the Bible in such a short time. I saw big themes and patterns in ways that I had never seen before. What stuck out the most to me? The theme of God exalting the humble and humbling the exalted was everywhere and said in so many different ways. Shout out to The Voice, my new favorite version of the Bible. And shout out to the Bible Project book summary videos for helping me along the way.

~

Now for the runners up. I kid you not: in another year many of these excellent reads would've made it into the top. The competition was stiff this year. So many good books here:

"Brown Girl Dreaming" by Jacqueline Woodson - The author's memoir, written completely in poetry form. I've never read anything like it - beautiful and multi-award winning.

"Between Midnight and Dawn" by Sara Arthur - A feast of Scripture, poetry, and excerpts from literature to guide your Lent through Eastertide. This grounded me during March-May 2020.

"The Color of Compromise" by Jemar Tisby - A historical survey of the white American church's complicity in racism from early US history to the present day. There were so many times we could've courageously chosen a different way, but we didn't.

"The Vanishing Half" by Brit Bennett - This brand new, New York Times bestselling novel is a page turner. Explores themes of race and identity through the story of twin sisters who choose to lead divergent lives.

"The Very Good Gospel" by Lisa Sharon Harper - The author is one of my favorite Christian speakers, thinkers, leaders and this book offers such a whole and hopeful look at the good news of Jesus.

"Nectar in a Sieve" by Kamala Markandaya - This novel, which follows the life story of an Indian peasant woman, is loosely based on the author's life, was written 65 years ago to critical acclaim, and has sold over a million copies since.

"The Next Evangelicalism" by Soong Chan Rah - I felt like the author was in my head and reading my mind as he explored the future of the evangelical church in America.

"Between the World and Me" by Ta'Nahesi Coates - I listened to the audiobook and loved the experience. His writing style felt as if it veered into poetry at times as he so poignantly spoke of his life as a Black man in America.

Here are my top reads from previous years:

2019, 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015

10 Things I Learned in April

Something about the strangeness of this season made me dust off the old blog and wrote a "Ten Things I Learned In April" post. Enjoy!

~

I learned that "100's & 1000's" is Australian for "sprinkles."

I learned that homeschooling is doable. Though if I didn't have a husband jumping in for significant chunks, I would possibly die or go insane.

I learned that my first grader doesn't know what pennies and dimes are. Everyday, Grace was breezing through the math portion of her homeschool morning until we got to the page where her American workbook not-helpfully-for-expat-kids used pennies and dimes to explain the concept of ones and tens. Grace was just confused until I pulled out a 10 baht and 1 baht coin and explained it that way.

I learned why the label "model minority" is harmful to Asian-Americans. Shout out to episode 72 on anti-Asian racism during the pandemic on one of my favorite podcasts "The New Activist." So much goodness all over this podcast.

I learned that going to immigration is indeed boring and exhausting. Picture being at the DMV from 7am to 2pm. That's what going to immigration is like. This time around though, we were hopeful that it would be somewhat fun since we've been stuck in our house/neighborhood for weeks. Nope. Exhausting. And I spilled Khao Soi on my dress. Buuut, we walked away with the six month visas we were needing, yay!

I learned that all three of my kids are still capable of getting sick even while under quarantine. Cora got a blistering rash on the back of her fingers from contact with a rove beetle which later got infected and necessitated a trip to the dermatologist. A couple weeks later, Grace mysteriously threw up. A couple days later, Isaiah threw up too. Impressive getting sick skills, children! (Update: and then in early May, Cora threw up, and then Isaiah threw up again, and then I was sick for a couple days with what I'll just call "the opposite of throw up.")

I learned how to make orange marmalade. It was REAL good. Though I suppose it doesn't look so good after all that talk about throwing up.

I learned that a large (3x2 meters!) inflatable pool provides HOURS of entertainment for my kids. Happy kids, happy parents!

I learned about the wonders of slow television. When the days are just so long, we turn on slow tv and leave it playing in the background of our day. So far, we've ridden a train for eight hours over the mountains in Norway, hiked for an hour through a forest in Sweden, followed indigenous Sami women on a two hour reindeer sleigh journey above the arctic circle in wintertime (it ends with the Northern lights!)

I learned that I can cut my husband's hair. And not just some ugly hack job. It actually looks good.

Top Four Books of 2019

Every night before I go to sleep, I read. I've kept this habit for well over 10 years, and I don't think I could fall asleep without this ritual.

All these daily minutes have added up. In 2019, I read about two dozen books cover to cover. Here are my four favorites in no particular order. 

(You'll quickly see that I have a soft spot for memoirs and novels that immerse me into a life experience completely different than my own.)

The Girl With Seven Names by Hyeonseo Lee

Genre: memoir

Year Published: 2015

Description: The story of a young woman's childhood in and eventual escape from North Korea, her years-long struggle to avoid repatriation, and her eventual resettlement in South Korea.

Why I loved it: The story of Lee's childhood simultaneously revealed the horrors of life in North Korea while at the same time humanizing everyday life. After putting the book down, I was left with the impression that life in North Korea is more horrible than I ever thought… but also filled with the normalcy of everyday life. I also walked away from the book with a deeper sympathy for the experience of refugees living in that liminal space of not being able to go "home" but not having a new home yet, in fear of being sent back but having nowhere to go. Incredible, powerful story.

Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson

Genre: memoir / nonfiction policy

Year Published: 2015

Description: This book is all about Bryan Stevenson's org, Equal Justice Initiative, and the work he has done exonerating innocent people on death row and pursuing more humane sentencing and the elimination of racial bias in America's criminal justice system.

Why I liked it: This book was simultaneously infuriating and eye-opening. Stevenson writes on the issue of racism in America's criminal justice system as an expert with years of experience as a lawyer working with clients and communities who have been the victims of bias. I was deeply impressed by Stevenson's concern for the individual clients and communities he represented. He persevered down to the last legal minutiae to care for them even though winning their case was far from guaranteed. Out of the case work for his clients came opportunities to change the culture and address systemic injustice.

My Life, My Love, My Legacy by Coretta Scott King

Genre: autobiography/memoir

Year Published: 2017

Description: The life story of Coretta Scott King - civil rights activist, mother of four, and wife of Martin Luther King, Jr.

Why I liked it: I've always heard that the civil rights movement was spearheaded by Christians. But, it wasn't until reading this book that I realized just how much the entire movement was inspired by Jesus, fueled by the Holy Spirit, and steeped in prayer. This book encouraged me to live bravely and boldly for Jesus. In white, American, evangelical circles (where I come from), we often uphold Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Corrie ten Boom, and William Wilberforce as our protestant "saints" - models of bravery and courage in the face of evil. We would do well to add Coretta Scott King to their ranks. Also, did you know Coretta Scott King was a concert singer? She toured the US giving concerts where she weaved song and storytelling to raise funds for the civil rights movement and to educate the public. Such a neat example of the beautiful weaving together of the arts, justice, and faith.

Becoming by Michelle Obama

Genre: memoir

Year Published: 2018

Description: Former FLOTUS writes about her life from childhood in Chicago's South Side all the way through First Lady of the United States up to the present day.

Why I liked it: Before picking up the book, "Becoming," I was vaguely aware that Michelle Obama was a highly accomplished woman before she ever became an Obama… something about Princeton and Harvard Law. What I wasn't aware of was that she can write. I have read dozens of memoirs and autobiographies in my life and "Becoming" is the most well-written of them all. The stories she weaves from her childhood were particularly beautiful. Stories from her experience inside the White House were fun and interesting too.


Honorable mentions:
"The Making of a Leader" by Bobby Clinton
"Overrated" by Eugene Cho
"Born a Crime" by Trevor Noah


Favorite books from other years: 2018, 2017, 2016, and 2015.

Three Seasons

The change of seasons. We feel it in our bones. The changes tell us we are on track. They inform our culture and give us a deep sense that what we are doing is right.

From when I was born until I turned thirty, I lived in four different places that went through the cycle of four seasons.

I remember warm summers in Portugal building sandcastles at the beach. I remember our apartment getting cold and damp in the winter and feeling mesmerized by the beauty of frost on the grass some mornings.

I remember humid summers in Illinois playing for hours a day in our family's above-ground, backyard pool. In winter, we crammed in post-school snow play before the night fell early.

I remember dry summers in Colorado, thunder rumbling somewhere in the sky almost every afternoon. I remember Christmases - the grass all brown and crispy, patches of snow in the shade, bare trees, and the brilliant blue sky overhead.

Even California had four seasons. I remember summers getting hotter and hotter, not a drop of rain with temps peaking in August and September bringing wildfires. By December, it was finally cool. Drizzly rains came and citrus trees were heavy with oranges and lemons.

When I left these Northern climates and came to Thailand, a tropical country with three seasons - hot, rainy, and cool, everything felt… wrong. Without the cyclical unfolding of four seasons, I felt like I had lost my bearing. 

December 2017 visiting Colorado and building a snowman ...versus...

December 2019 in Bangkok tromping around the flowers at the King's Park

But, now approaching four years of calling this tropical country "home," I now recognize the march through our three seasons -- hot; rainy; and cool -- and as the seasons pass one into the other I feel comforted because I expect them.

Here in Bangkok, the holidays come not with pumpkin spice everything or avoiding slushy puddles in the Target parking lot, but with an end to the rains, a stiff breeze, and runs at the local park amidst millions of flowers planted in honor of the late King's birthday. Every morning, we try to decide "Should we open the windows to let in the finally cool air or keep them shut against the pollution?"

In a few months, just as trees in the States put out fragile tight buds, the schools here let out. The heat index soars to 110… 120. I walk slowly along the sidewalk, hugging the shade, and pouring sweat. The smell of motorbike exhaust mixes with the smell of durian being chopped, weighed, and sold from the back of a pickup truck. With no rainfall and no clouds to block the relentless sun, even the pool and the ocean get too hot to cool us down and the entire nation throws water at each other to welcome the Thai New Year.

Right around when teachers and students in the States press through the last stretch to summer break, the clouds here quickly pile up high and dark, the wind whips. And minutes later the rain pours hard marking the beginning of five months of rainy season - time to pull out the uniforms and sharpen the pencils… back to school the kids go.

In September and October, pictures from the US tease us with images of sweaters and carved pumpkins. Here, the hot and humid rainy season presses on, no changes perceptible, though if you step outside and look up, there are hundreds of dragonflies flitting about just a few meters above the ground. Where they come from and where they go, I don't know, but I look for them every year.

As I now cycle through the three seasons from hot to rainy (and still hot) to cool(ish) I feel comforted because I am beginning to feel the change in my bones. Things are starting to feel on track. Things are starting to feel right again.

Isaiah - 2 years old

Isaiah turned two last month. What is he like these days? Here are a few little stories that capture a lot of the essence of two-year-old Isaiah.

~

Late this afternoon, as dinnertime was approaching, I turned on the TV for the kids and got busy cooking. As usual, Isaiah heard my noises in the kitchen, came downstairs, grabbed a kitchen chair with his two hands, pushed it across the kitchen to the counter where I was preparing dinner, and climbed up standing next to me.

He busied himself with whatever kitchen things he could reach from his perch on the kitchen chair while I put greens and veggies into a bowl to make a salad. I sliced the top quarter off a lemon and squeezed the juice over the top.

"Mommy, want some lemon!" Isaiah said. So I gave him the rest of the lemon to hold.

"Slice it, Mommy!"

"You want a slice? Here you go." I handed him a circle of lemon and he squeezed the juice over the top of the salad, just like mommy.

Sometimes Isaiah and I prep a mountain of vegetable sticks for healthy munching. He loves it when I let him hold the carrot and the peeler. My large hands gently hold and guide his dimpled chubby hands that grip the carrot and the peeler. As the peels fall into the trash, he exclaims, "Oooo, mommy!"

Most mornings, Michael makes eggs for himself. If Isaiah is up in time, he helps. Michael cracks the eggs into a bowl and Isaiah beats them with a fork in just a few swift motions without spilling a drop.

Many, many hours are spent with this boy in the kitchen:

Isaiah is talking up a storm these days. He particularly loves his big sisters' most used phrases...
Look at me!
Can I see?
Can I try?
That's mine!
And my new favorite: What are you doing, Mommy?
His most impressive sentences are six or more words all strung together. Often they are about construction sites that he sees while I drive, "Oooo, Mommy, look! A cement truck out Cora's window!" Cement truck is pronounced "heh-ment truck."

Isaiah was thrilled when Daddy parked the car and walked him onto a construction site:

He also loves to sing. Amazing Grace, ABC's, Let it Go, Twinkle Twinkle and a couple Thai songs are his favorites.

When asked what color something is, Isaiah very confidently answers the wrong color. When asked to count, he says something along the lines of, "one two three four five six seven eleven twelve thirteen" while pointing to objects randomly and sometimes pointing to the same object two or three times.

~

Isaiah started going to nursery/daycare at his sister's Thai school. The first two days he yell-cried... but only for two minutes. Since then, he hasn't cried at all. He is a bundle of cute energy whenever I pick him up. Today he told me "Anuban is so fun." This weekend, he started singing a Thai song about a butterfly that we've never taught him, must've picked it up at school!

~

Isaiah, It is an absolute joy to get to be your Mommy. I am so proud of you, buddy!

Cora - Five Years Old

Our sweet, middle child, Cora, turned FIVE today! What is she like these days?

If Cora was an animal, she would be a worker bee. She goes to full day, Thai preschool where the production level that her teachers expect is more akin to American 1st grade. When she comes home, I ask her, "Cora, do you want to run off and play or do your homework?" "Homework!" she yells back. She contently sits at the kitchen table for 20-30 minutes, coloring, cutting and gluing, doing simple math problems, and painstakingly writing Thai letters and words that look like this: หนู

Some of her favorite activities include putting her laundry away, wiping walls with wet sponges while singing Cinderella songs, setting the table, and helping me cook. Every morning, she pulls up her bedsheet, tucks in her stuffed animals, and lays her blanket on top smoothing out all the wrinkles.

Cora eats and sleeps so much. When she is tired or hungry, all of her productive, self-sufficient energy evaporates and she crumples to the ground exclaiming, "Mommy, I don't want to do ANYTHING!" She goes from worker bee mode to sloth mode sometimes unable to even dress herself for bed.

Cora loves arts and beautiful things. She'll often disappear to another room in the house to work on a coloring book or to make a card for a family member. She plans her outfits and hairstyles days, sometimes weeks, in advance. She dresses up as a princess, Thai dancer, or ballerina every day. I taught Cora how to embroider, look at her go!

Cora loves to be silly. Her favorite word is butt in Thai "gohn." "Mommy look, there's a PRINCESS on my GOHN!" she'll yell, wearing just undies, her bottom high in the air showing off her favorite pair of undies that have Snow White on the butt. She bursts into a piercing cackle, her huge, almost black eyes gleaming and her mouth open wide showing perfect rows of tiny teeth.

Cora adores her big sister, Grace, buuut she can be a total little sister punk to her. She knows just what to say and do to burst Grace's bubble and she does it quietly provoking tears and screams. When I check in on why Grace is terribly upset, Cora has a sly, pleased with herself smile on her face.

Cora also adores her little brother, Isaiah, buuut she tries to be his little mommy. She is very fearful for him and protective, grabbing his hands or his waist and trying to move him away from danger. Isaiah usually starts fussing and crying, "No want to Doowuh!" (He calls her "doowuh"!) I often have to ensure her, "Cora, let him go, I'm watching him, I won't let him get hurt." My favorite is when she tries to carry him. He's not quite two-years-old, they are about the same size, yet she can usually get his feet off the ground.

Cora, I love and cherish you. It's so amazing to watch you grow and learn. I'm so glad I get to be your mommy!

~

Each year, on my kids' birthdays until they turn five, I write up a blog post - an attempt to capture their personalities during their little years to remember later. These are by far, absolutely my favorite posts to re-read. Here are the posts from when Cora turned four, three, two, and one.